Today was a good day

 Writing actually helps me get my thoughts together even though I sound like I'm mental in almost every post. I found three potential jobs and plenty of potential places to live. I think I just needed to trip out for a second. Consistency is definitely key, so not only do I hope to maintain this job and not go off the deep end into my feelings, but I also hope to stay abstinent. Now don't get it confused I won't be holding on until marriage but just until I feel like someone sees the true value in me and I feel the same way about them. Until I'll be calling my fingers daddy and telling myself I'm a good girl. In a previous post I was talking about how the past teaches you lessons. Well, this time when I'm on my own I won't let anyone come between my success. I let my good for absolutely nothing ex come over time and time again even though the rules clearly stated no guest, and this man got caught with a gun in the house. Now I do place some of the blame on him but mostly myself because I knew better. This time around I have to do better I can't keep having slips where my life goes completely downhill. Today I showed myself there is a way out of depression and honestly, I think it's because I can hear God again. I think I was preciously ignoring him because I knew the decisions I was making were against his word. Running only prolonged my suffering in the end so now he's teaching me to stay on track.

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